Wedding Invitations

Just as most people believe there should be a minimum age to consume libations, I am starting to think that there should also be a minimum age to be a flower girl at a wedding.

I’m sure that images come to mind of the perfect flower girl- smiling, angelic little treasure that she is. But aren’t three-year-olds just a bit less removed from their “terrible two’s” tantrums to be reliable flower girls at a wedding?

The answer is, it depends. You’ve probably seen three and four-year-old-flower girls who were more than well-behaved. But alas, there are tales of those who were not.

Take for example an anonymous responder to EtiquetteHell.com, a site that is an extension of Wedding Etiquette Hell,” a great book by Jeanne Hamilton.

“The bride (Mary) decided to have the groom’s 3 year old niece (Becky) as her flower girl,” one reader writes. “Becky was supposed to walk down the aisle right before the bride. Unfortunately, Becky decided at the last minute that she did not want to walk down the aisle by her self. Instead of her mother (Laura - who was in the wedding party) taking her hand, poor Mary was forced to walk down the aisle holding Becky’s hand.”

Almost immediately, as the reader tells it, the plan started to unravel.

“And instead of walking normally, Becky glued herself to Mary’s side and walked attached to Mary’s leg and sort of behind her at the same time,” the reader adds. “Becky was also crying. Since Mary’s other hand held her bouquet, Mary’s father could not hold his own daughter’s hand. It was a very awkward walk down the aisle.”

Lessons learned? The commenter definitely has some.

“My advice to parents of flower girls and ring bearers: any child under the age of 4 is too young!,” she states loud and clear. “They throw tantrums and their moods change very quickly. They may look sweet and cute in their wedding finery, but a sobbing child throwing a tantrum is not the way a bride and groom want to remember their wedding.

“Parents are responsible for their children wherever they are – including weddings.”

(EtiquetteHell.com)