Sure, the bride and groom have a lot to do in planning and preparing for their wedding (perhaps the bride most of all), but there’s two other women who have some very important roles in the blissful day:  the mothers.  Let’s face it, if it weren’t for the mother of the bride and the mother of the groom, would we even be talking about this particular wedding? So let’s honor their contributions and take a closer look at their parts in the wedding, especially as they pertain to wedding etiquette.

To begin with, the Mother Of The Bride’s absolute #1 goal is to make sure that the bride’s wishes are carried out the way that she wants them to be. The mother of the bride is there to help her to make sure that what she wants and what she needs happens.  At the same time, it is very important that the mother of the bride allows for the bride’s tastes, desires and needs to be provided for. This does not mean that they can dictate what happens, but rather should ensure that what does is what the bride wants. As one of the largest role players, the mother of the bride should help to find the perfect dress for the wedding, including undergarments and accessories. Remember, mothers:  it’s not your tastes, but hers that should come through.  Also, the mother of the bride should help to organize guest lists, coordinating with the mother of the groom. If the mother of the groom does not contact her, she should make the first attempt.

And now to the mother of the groom’s role.  To begin with, the importance of providing an accurate and timely guest list can neither be over emphasized, nor the importance of sticking to the guidelines given her as to the number of guests she many invite.  Remember to include zip codes!  t is the bride’s mother who will first select a dress for her daughters wedding. A gown of  complimentary color and similar styling is then chosen by the mother of the groom.  She must wear long if the bride’s mother wears long or short if she wears short.  The color should not match the bridesmaids, nor the brides’ mother, but compliment both.  It is the responsibility of the groom’s parents to host the rehearsal dinner.

The line between responsibility, tradition, and proper wedding etiquette is sometimes blurry and even a little confusing, but one thing is for certain:  using wedding etiquette as a guideline in the planning of a wedding goes a very long way towards ensuring a lovely, memorable, and pleasant day will be had by all in attendance.