Wedding Invitations

Let’s get away for a wedding!  These days, you’ll find that a destination wedding is more of a common concept and countless island resorts and cruise lines are definitely making it easier for the couple wanting a destination wedding – many such places even have an in-house wedding coordinator to make everything all that much easier on the bride and groom.

No question about it, it’s appealing to many people, and as a result, many engaged couples today are opting for a simple getaway, or destination, wedding.   Some of these couples see it as a way to combine wedding ceremony and honeymoon into one, while others feel that the intimate and relaxing atmosphere of a destination wedding is the ideal part.

It’s not all simple, though.  A part of destination wedding planning that isn’t necessarily easier for the bride and groom is putting together the guest list.  Space for guests is typically very limited but at the same time, it’s all too easy to run the risk of offending friends or family by not sending them an invitation, even if they weren’t going to be able to attend.  Although destination wedding etiquette is a fairly new concept, your guests will surely appreciate any efforts, large or small, that you might make towards their comfort and enjoyment.

Do remember that getaway weddings can take a little extra work is that when planning a very small wedding (barely any guests at all, even close family) you have a delicate etiquette dance to explain to friends and family who expect to be able to attend.  If you think some folks would be tremendously upset to learn they weren’t invited — even if no one was invited at all — then consider whether those hurt feelings are outweighed by your plans for an intimate wedding with just the bride and groom.  It may seem like it’s just one day, but if you’ll have to hear about how you left them out at the next 50 years’ worth of holiday dinners, you might want to consider this carefully.

There are many people for whom shedding a tear or two or twenty-two at a wedding is a normal thing. These tears aren’t signs of major woe or regret, but are instead a natural byproduct of that happy little thrill of joy that we get from seeing a happy couple joined together in marriage. Some people don’t even need to personally know the newlyweds to start welling up, nor do the newlyweds even need to be real people (but instead be characters in a movie or even book) to cue the crying. Whether it’s Princess Diana’s wedding, the latest celebrity wedding on the cover of the tabloid magazines, or your college roommate’s wedding, the odds are good that you’ll find onlookers who are dabbing away the tears with a handkerchief.

Wedding etiquette experts and books don’t have much to say about shedding tears at a wedding, although one would imagine that it would be best to follow common sense. For instance, etiquette would surely frown upon wiping away one’s tears with the bride’s veil, even if it’s very handy.

An interesting thing is that there is an old wedding superstition about brides and tears. It says that the bride is not supposed to cry on her wedding day, prior to the ceremony, but is free to weep (with joy, of course) following the vows. Why is this? Well, superstition (and not wedding etiquette!) contends that plentiful tears proves that the bride is not a witch, as witches were said to be only able to cry three single tears from her left eye. Now that is some helpful information to have.

Newly engaged? The odds are good that you’re plenty overwhelmed at the thought of all there is to do to plan your wedding and you might not know where to begin. We thought we’d give a few pointers to get you started, as well as a reminder that it won’t go on forever and all that hard work will result in a beautiful day for you and your future spouse to remember for years to come.

Among the important things to decide early on would be the date of the wedding. You don’t necessarily have to have a firm date and time squared away within 72 hours of that engagement ring going on your finger, that’s definitely not in any wedding etiquette or planning guides, but a general idea of how much time you’ll have to plan this wedding is a handy thing to have, both for you and for your family and other members of your wedding party.

Have you always dreamed of a spring wedding? Or perhaps the thought of a Christmas wedding gets your heart racing. These are the kinds of date-setting we’re talking about. From there, you can go on to pick locations for both ceremony and reception, wedding gowns, flowers, and bridesmaid dresses. But without the date, you can’t make very many firm plans.

It’s important to also keep in mind that many wedding-related items must be ordered months in advance, such as the gowns and the wedding invitations. Factor in that wedding etiquette also advises that it’s best to send invitations out anywhere between one to two months before the wedding, and you’ll quickly see that there’s a lot more planning involved than you might have originally thought.

I have to second Kate Wood’s suggestion in yesterday’s wedding etiquette blog. Buy a dress in your current size, instead of buying a smaller dress in the hopes of fitting into it by the wedding. It’s simply too risky and there’s no guarantee you will shrink into it by your wedding day, regardless of how ambitious, determined or motivated you are to lose weight. (Same advice goes for not just the bride, but the bridesmaids as well).

One thing to keep in mind is “are you the kind of person who tends to gain weight when stressed?” If so, you may not want to get a dress two sizes smaller, no matter how good your intentions to loose weight are.

My sister is a perfect example of this. We are cursed in our family with a low metabolism to begin with, but when we get stressed we gain weight, despite exercise and healthy eating. She bought her wedding dress at the exact size she was already at. Over the course of a few months as the wedding was approaching, she gained weight. (I personally think it’s because she went from biking and walking, to driving her fiancés car - on top of stress).

On her wedding day it was a tight squeeze and amazingly didn’t pass out from lack of oxygen and circulation. If she had bought her dress smaller, she would have had to buy a brand new one at the last minute.

If you buy a dress that fits just right and you happen to loose weight before the wedding, at least you can have it taken in and not have to buy a new dress.

Kate Woods article can be found at:
http://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/couplesandmarriage/articletkt.aspx?cp-
documentid=4845421

Have you ever heard or received advice from someone in your life that makes you think “what are they thinking?!” Well, weddings are no exceptions. Check out these bad advices I found online (and comments from the wedding etiquette pros). Warning, some of it will make you cringe.

Bad Advice:
“My future father-in-law thought that since we were getting married in an historic home and I’m a costume designer, we should wear hoopskirts and crinolines!” —Abbey, Austin, TX

Bad Advice:
“The worst wedding advice anyone has told me was to sing our vows to each other.” —Erin, Richmond, VA
The Pros Advice:
We totally encourage personalizing your vows, but unless you moonlight as opera singers, leave the American Idol aspirations for the after-party.

Bad Advice:
“My mom insisted that I wear my gold-colored junior prom dress as my wedding gown. She thought it was silly to buy yet another dress that I’d only wear once.” —Alyssa, Madison, WI
The Pros Advice:
While hand-me-down gowns can add a sentimental touch and colored gowns are gaining popularity, most prom dresses should stay securely in the back of the closet for the wedding day.

Bad Advice:
“I was told that if the groom was unavailable during the toast, the bride has to kiss the best man.” —Anonymous
The Pros Advice:
Making out with the best man at the reception is a great idea — if your wedding happens to fall on Opposite Day.

The original article can be found at:
http://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/couplesandmarriage/articletkt.aspx?cp-

documentid=6255411&GT1=32001

Be sure to read our wedding etiquette blog again tomorrow for more bad advice ;0)

If you noticed a lot of activity at any given church and or country club yesterday, there was a good reason for it. Las Vegas was especially busy as those in love wanted extra luck on their wedding day. Yesterday was the most popular wedding day of the year - in fact, it was the most popular wedding day for the past century.

We here at http://www.beautifulweddinginvitations.com saw this coming months ago as we started getting many wedding invitations with the wedding date of 7/7/07. It remains to be seen if this was the luckiest wedding day of the century, but it was certainly one of the busiest. There are no official numbers yet as to how many weddings took place yesterday, but www.TheKnot.com indicated that over 38,000 couples on their registry got married yesterday.

The date was popular for a number of reasons. Seven is considered to be an auspicious number in a number of different cultures. One groom stated that he’ll never forget his anniversary date. In the orthodox Jewish tradition, the bride circles the groom seven times when she arrives at the chuppah, which is a canopy used in weddings. Seven candles are lit during Kwanzaa. There are seven wonders of the world. The Big Dipper is formed from seven stars. Buddha is said to have walked seven steps upon his birth. The Islamic tradition involves seven levels of heaven. The ancient city of Rome was said to be built on seven hills. There are seven deadly sins, as well as virtues, in some Christian traditions. And gamblers hit the jackpot with the slot machine combination 7-7-7.

Wedding professionals are no hoping that another triplicate, 8/8/08, will be a popular date. (That is a Friday) as well as consecutive numbers like 6/7/8 (Saturday). Somehow, 6/6/06 didn’t arrive with the same fanfare. (For one reason, that was a Tuesday). I think that any date will be hard to compete with the lucky 7s.

Plan a theme for the rehearsal dinner and weave it throughout your centerpieces, attire, or entertainment. One couple had all the guests arrive in Western garb for their hoedown barbecue rehearsal dinner, complete with hay bales and square dancing, while another served up make-you-own-fajitas at a Mexican fiesta.

Consider alternative locations and styles for the rehearsal dinner, such as a private room at a fun pizza restaurant, a beach cookout, or dinner and dancing aboard a privately chartered boat.

If your in-laws are giving the rehearsal dinner and it seems as though it is getting a bit too extravagant, have your fiancé talk to his parents and pull in the reins. You want to be sure that this event does not in some way outshine the wedding day.

Enjoy the rehearsal dinner, as it will be more intimate than the wedding day and will allow you and your betrothed to mingle more substantially than on the big day.

Ahhh, the parties—and there will be many: one or more showers, the bachelor and bachelorette parties, the wedding rehearsal, and the rehearsal dinner, to name a few. But don’t worry: You and your fiancé are the stars of the show, and these festive events resolve around you. Just keep your sense of humor and your wits about you, celebrate your love for each other, and enjoy the fun!

Bridesmaids and groomsmen, close friends of the bride and groom, or relatives of the couple’s parents typically give a bridal shower or two for the bride, or couple’s showers for both, and usually organize the bachelorette party and the bachelor party, respectively.

You’ll likely be intimately involved in planning the wedding rehearsal, rehearsal dinner, and actual wedding on the other hand, unless you’ve hired a wedding consultant.

Rehearsing for the big day and seeing the wedding party and out-of-town guests all together at the rehearsal dinner will be your final reminders that your wedding day is almost here.

Wedding Etiquette as an unaccompanied wedding guest has its own implications.

I have some direct experience with this issue. Not all that long ago, I was invited to my cousin’s son’s wedding.

The wedding ceremony was great, but I was one of the few guests who came alone.

I could have brought a guest, but I didn’t know if that was encouraged or not.

Not being crass enough to call my cousin and ask if that would have been OK, I attended all by myself (not a problem, especially since I danced off about five extra pounds at the post-wedding reception).

But that got me to thinking- what is the Wedding Etiquette way of determining if it is OK to bring a guest to the wedding?

I put the matter out of my mind until I recently read a Q-A from TheKnot.com on this very issue.

The question was: “I’ve been invited to a friend’s wedding, but I don’t want to go alone. Is it okay to bring a date?”

Some wise advice was provided by Lisa Carse, who supplied the answer from The Knot to the website of WABC-TV, New York.

“Check your invitation envelope. Does it just say your name or does it say your name “plus guest”? If yours is the only name on the envelope, then you’re the only one who’s been officially invited. Resist the urge to ask the couple if you can bring a guest anyway.

“Instead, figure out who else might be attending the wedding solo and plan your transportation (and accommodations) with them, if possible. If it’s still too uncomfortable to attend alone, then you can politely decline the invitation.”

(The Knot, via WABC-TV, New York)

    So…this is your big day - Your Wedding Day!
Congratulations. Over the last few months, you have probably planned the
biggest party of your lifetime and now it is time for you to enjoy the fruits
of your labor. Not only that, you get to be the star of the show - all eyes
will be on you as your family and friends share in this momentous celebration
of a life time. What’s left to do? Well, there are just a few loose ends you
need to tie up.

• Visit your beauty salon for hair
  styling and make-up (bring your veil and headpiece with you.
• Make sure that the wedding
  gown is pressed and steamed.
• Bring a change of clothes if
  you are leaving for your honeymoon.
• Be sure that both you and
  your fiancé eat something nutritious. You will need the energy.
• Don’t forget the rings and
  license.
• Send out your wedding
  announcements.
• Get dressed 1 - 1 1/2 hours
  before the ceremony.
• Try to relax and enjoy the
  day - unwind yourself…and savor the unfolding of your special day. Let
  someone else take care of any last minute unavoidable details. If anything
  goes differently than planned, chances are, you are the only ones who will
  notice.
• Hug your family.
• Thank all who helped.
• Include your new in-laws into
  your happiness and in the limelight.
• Laugh and enjoy your day to
  the fullest. This should be the happiest day of your life!

Congratulations again! Next time we will touch on the few
things left to do after the wedding.